Hear of a Good One Lately

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Eustace
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Eustace »

Attention! Online scams!
Before the holidays I ordered an expensive perfume and a gold bracelet for my wife, but we received two fishing rods and a fishing chair...
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Quick Steel
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Quick Steel »

:lol: :lol: :lol: Very funny Eustace.
doglegg
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by doglegg »

Very good Eustace. ::tounge:: ::tounge:: ::tounge::
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OLDE CUTLER
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by OLDE CUTLER »

Sign seen along the street up here in the frozen North:
THE 5 STAGES OF WINTER
1. Anger
2. Denial
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. April
"Sometimes even the blind chicken finds corn"
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Quick Steel
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Quick Steel »

A good one OC. :)
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by jmh58 »

OLDE CUTLER wrote: Sat Jan 16, 2021 4:53 pm Sign seen along the street up here in the frozen North:
THE 5 STAGES OF WINTER
1. Anger
2. Denial
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. April
::tu:: ::rotflol:: ::clapping::
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Make sure some of them are Dirt!!!
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Mumbleypeg
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Mumbleypeg »

Member AKTI, TSRA, NRA.

If your religion requires that you hate someone, you need a new religion.

When the people fear their government, that is tyranny. When government fears the people, that is freedom.

https://www.akti.org/
Stanwade
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Stanwade »

https://fashionista.com/2021/01/health- ... perts-2021


Need a good laugh? Read this absurd article about "wellness"... It's almost as if each contributer was told to outdo the last one with outlandish, non-meaning thoughts and random ideas without really saying anything..lol.. these are the type of people that think they know what's best for the "collective".... Seriously - - read it, it is so absurd it is funny...
Ryan

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Quick Steel
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Quick Steel »

" I think avoiding assumptions and softening expectations of how you should' feel is key."

I think we shouldn't overlook the high level of wisdom in some of this pablum. I mean, my expectations have been softening for years. So much so in fact that I think the senior years might be called "The Great Softening." Then too I try to keep assumptions out of my life. I have made genuine progress in this; I no longer assume the sun will rise on a daily basis. Can you imagine my wellness joy upon rising every morning to find a still functioning sun.
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Stanwade »

Quick Steel wrote: Thu Jan 21, 2021 4:11 am " I think avoiding assumptions and softening expectations of how you should' feel is key."

I think we shouldn't overlook the high level of wisdom in some of this pablum. I mean, my expectations have been softening for years. So much so in fact that I think the senior years might be called "The Great Softening." Then too I try to keep assumptions out of my life. I have made genuine progress in this; I no longer assume the sun will rise on a daily basis. Can you imagine my wellness joy upon rising every morning to find a still functioning sun.

::clapping:: ::clapping::
Ryan

“That’ll be the day”—-John Wayne
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thankgod4rkids
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by thankgod4rkids »

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea.
As he sat facing her old pump organ, the young minister noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water. In the water floated, of all things, a condom! When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist. "Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?" pointing to the bowl. "Oh, yes" she replied, "isn't it wonderful?
I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter!" The pastor fainted.

Hahaha! 😃 😃 😃
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Paladin »

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Ray
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by fergusontd »

::groove:: A whole new use for the "RAINCOAT!" ftd
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Waukonda
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Waukonda »

I Just Hate Spelling Errors......

You mix up two letters, and your whole post is urined!
Ike
Stanwade
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Stanwade »

What do you call a fluffle of rabbits hopping backwards? A receding "hare" line😁
Ryan

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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Stanwade »

.
Attachments
Screenshot_20210224-151611.png
Ryan

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OLDE CUTLER
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by OLDE CUTLER »

From our local paper today.
IMG_4105.JPG
"Sometimes even the blind chicken finds corn"
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Mumbleypeg
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Mumbleypeg »

OLDE CUTLER wrote: Sun Feb 28, 2021 3:28 pm From our local paper today.

IMG_4105.JPG
Not to worry. If he has a phone on Mars he’ll be getting robocalls offering him a warranty. ::barf::

Ken
Member AKTI, TSRA, NRA.

If your religion requires that you hate someone, you need a new religion.

When the people fear their government, that is tyranny. When government fears the people, that is freedom.

https://www.akti.org/
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OLDE CUTLER
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by OLDE CUTLER »

Birds of a feather flock together, and then they crap on your car.
"Sometimes even the blind chicken finds corn"
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Quick Steel
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Quick Steel »

:) All too true OC.
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Stanwade »

I've been recently diagnosed with kleptomania.. sometimes it's so bad, I have to take something for it 😁
Ryan

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TPK
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by TPK »

Stanwade wrote: Sun Mar 07, 2021 7:15 am I've been recently diagnosed with kleptomania.. sometimes it's so bad, I have to take something for it 😁
You could save a lot of money. ::hmm:: Visit more cutlery stores. :lol:

If ya get caught just say, "Sorry, I'll have to cut that out!" ::rotflol::
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Stanwade
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by Stanwade »

TPK wrote: Sun Mar 07, 2021 11:33 am
Stanwade wrote: Sun Mar 07, 2021 7:15 am I've been recently diagnosed with kleptomania.. sometimes it's so bad, I have to take something for it 😁
You could save a lot of money. ::hmm:: Visit more cutlery stores. :lol:

If ya get caught just say, "Sorry, I'll have to cut that out!" ::rotflol::
::hmm:: ::facepalm:: ::super_happy::
Ryan

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TPK
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by TPK »

Stanwade wrote: Sun Mar 07, 2021 3:06 pm
TPK wrote: Sun Mar 07, 2021 11:33 am
Stanwade wrote: Sun Mar 07, 2021 7:15 am I've been recently diagnosed with kleptomania.. sometimes it's so bad, I have to take something for it 😁
You could save a lot of money. ::hmm:: Visit more cutlery stores. :lol:

If ya get caught just say, "Sorry, I'll have to cut that out!" ::rotflol::
::hmm:: ::facepalm:: ::super_happy::
::super_happy:: :lol:
TOM - KGFG - (Knife-Guy-From-Germany)

I believe..., every knife is a soul, looking for a soulmate. :wink:

Weebit-Nano https://www.weebit-nano.com/
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Weebit_Nano

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doglegg
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Re: Hear of a Good One Lately

Post by doglegg »

What did Spartacus say when a lion ate his wife?


Nothing, He was gladiator!
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