Hear of a Good One Lately

[doglegg]

I read about an instance of some one using speech to text software, where the term lactose intolerant was converted to the text of " lacked toast and called her aunt".

[OLDE CUTLER]

Well yes, if my toaster didn't work, I would call my aunt for sure.

[Waukonda]

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[LKSKNIVES]

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Made me chuckle Ike

[C-WADE7]

A little humor for the 4th weekend,

What do you call a duck that spontaneously combust??

a “Fire-Quacker

[Waukonda]

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[doglegg]

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That fellow must have moved here from California.!

[Reverand]

An old Indian Chief was introducing his family, and told that his wife's name was "Three Horse".
"That's interesting!" One person replied. "How did they cone up with that name?"
The Chief replied, "Nag, nag, nag!"

[PringleTree]

An old Indian Chief was introducing his family, and told that his wife's name was "Three Horse".
"That's interesting!" One person replied. "How did they cone up with that name?"
The Chief replied, "Nag, nag, nag!"

Lol!

[QTCut5]

Sam, the commercial painter, would always thin his paint so it would go further. When the local church decided to repaint the outside, Sam put in a low bid and got the job. He thinned his paint way down as always. Standing on the scaffolding, the job nearly completed, he heard a horrendous clap of thunder, and the sky opened. The downpour left the thinned paint in terrible streaks and knocked Sam suddenly off his scaffold onto the soft cemetery lawn next to the church among gravestones and puddles of thinned, worthless paint. Sam knew this was a warning from the Almighty, so he got on his knees and cried: “Oh, God! Forgive me! How can I repent?” And from the thunder, a mighty voice thundered: “REPAINT! REPAINT! AND THIN NO MORE!”

[Mumbleypeg]

The pastor at our church told this recently.

Many years ago the first church he pastored was in west Texas, in the oil-rich Permian Basin. Before his first service one of the elders from the congregation told him, “Son, out here we have a lot of wildcat oilmen. When they set up a rig the rule is, if after 30 days they don’t strike oil, they stop boring and move on. Preaching is a lot the same. If you ain’t struck oil after 30 minutes, stop boring and move on”.


Ken