PETA Protests Marine Corps Terminology, ‘Leatherneck’
Posted: Tue Aug 28, 2012 6:48 pm
Edit: This is satirical humor. It's not real!
PETA: Marine Corps Terminology, ‘Leatherneck’ Term Promotes Animal Abuse
More satire from Duffel Blog by Nick Shafer on July 21, 2012 ·
Camp Pendleton, CA - A peaceful protest outside the main gate of Camp
Pendleton has erupted into violence today as Marines and activists
continue to spar over military terminology.
The protestors, from People For The Ethical Treatment of Animals
(PETA) have been holding a protest near the base for over a week
against the use of the terms “Leatherneck” and “Wooly-Pully.”
PETA spokesman have deemed the terms offensive and say they “promote
animal abuse.”
“These words that the Marines use are absolutely horrible,” said Jean
Richards, a PETA activist. “We will not stand by and let these people
continue to promote the killing of animals.”
Although no one understands how or why, the mild and peaceful protests
soon escalated into chaos.
PFC Anthony Smith, a Marine Private currently attending the School of
Infantry, reported that he was attacked while attempting to leave
base. His t-shirt, which had “Leatherneck” written across the front,
became a walking bullseye.
Luckily he was able to avoid the red paint they attempted to cover his
neck with, saying that he employed “a little move, block, strike, and
a little improvise, adapt, and overcome. Oh three hundred, Ooh-rah!”
But it wasn’t just the Marines being attacked.
PETA militants also have said that Marines were throwing hard boiled
eggs and hot dog water at them. Some even claim to have been beaten
with long pieces of meat byproduct.
PETA protesters turned to what they called their only defense. Using
out-of-tune acoustic guitars, the crowd sang songs of animal triumph
over human oppression.
Both civilian and military police worked together to break up the
melee because no one could stand the horrible PETA music any longer.
Peace talks have started, with top Marine brass explaining that
leather hasn’t been used around the neck of a Marines uniform since
long before PETA existed. Former CENTCOM Commander General James
Mattis also joined in the discussion, saying that the protestors
“should just go fuck themselves.”
The term “Leatherneck” will continue in service due to an old
grandfather clause that was produced faster than a a set of dummy
orders. “Woolly-pully,” the term for a Marines’ dress sweater, is
still under review. A few of the more popular choices of terms for the
sweater include: “hot-n-cotton”, “stitchy-itchy”, and
“polyester-molester.”
While the debate over the terms continues to rage, other groups have
been inspired by the protestors. A group called “Irish Respect
Association” has called for the Marine Corps to stop using the term
“Irish pennants.”
They have sent in numerous photographs of their clothing, clearly
showing no loose threads hanging as the term suggests.
PETA: Marine Corps Terminology, ‘Leatherneck’ Term Promotes Animal Abuse
More satire from Duffel Blog by Nick Shafer on July 21, 2012 ·
Camp Pendleton, CA - A peaceful protest outside the main gate of Camp
Pendleton has erupted into violence today as Marines and activists
continue to spar over military terminology.
The protestors, from People For The Ethical Treatment of Animals
(PETA) have been holding a protest near the base for over a week
against the use of the terms “Leatherneck” and “Wooly-Pully.”
PETA spokesman have deemed the terms offensive and say they “promote
animal abuse.”
“These words that the Marines use are absolutely horrible,” said Jean
Richards, a PETA activist. “We will not stand by and let these people
continue to promote the killing of animals.”
Although no one understands how or why, the mild and peaceful protests
soon escalated into chaos.
PFC Anthony Smith, a Marine Private currently attending the School of
Infantry, reported that he was attacked while attempting to leave
base. His t-shirt, which had “Leatherneck” written across the front,
became a walking bullseye.
Luckily he was able to avoid the red paint they attempted to cover his
neck with, saying that he employed “a little move, block, strike, and
a little improvise, adapt, and overcome. Oh three hundred, Ooh-rah!”
But it wasn’t just the Marines being attacked.
PETA militants also have said that Marines were throwing hard boiled
eggs and hot dog water at them. Some even claim to have been beaten
with long pieces of meat byproduct.
PETA protesters turned to what they called their only defense. Using
out-of-tune acoustic guitars, the crowd sang songs of animal triumph
over human oppression.
Both civilian and military police worked together to break up the
melee because no one could stand the horrible PETA music any longer.
Peace talks have started, with top Marine brass explaining that
leather hasn’t been used around the neck of a Marines uniform since
long before PETA existed. Former CENTCOM Commander General James
Mattis also joined in the discussion, saying that the protestors
“should just go fuck themselves.”
The term “Leatherneck” will continue in service due to an old
grandfather clause that was produced faster than a a set of dummy
orders. “Woolly-pully,” the term for a Marines’ dress sweater, is
still under review. A few of the more popular choices of terms for the
sweater include: “hot-n-cotton”, “stitchy-itchy”, and
“polyester-molester.”
While the debate over the terms continues to rage, other groups have
been inspired by the protestors. A group called “Irish Respect
Association” has called for the Marine Corps to stop using the term
“Irish pennants.”
They have sent in numerous photographs of their clothing, clearly
showing no loose threads hanging as the term suggests.