Glorious Insults

[jerryd6818]

These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words..


A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease."
· "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
·
"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
·
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
·
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow
·
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
·
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas
·
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain
·
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
· "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second ....
if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.

· "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop

· "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright

· "I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb

· "He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." - Samuel Johnson

· "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating

· "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand

· "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker

· "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain

· "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West

· "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." - Oscar Wilde

· "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

· "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder

· "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening.
But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

[Quick Steel]

Thank you. These are choice. Our politics would be so much more interesting if our candidates could engage each other with wit instead of acrimony.

[Iron Hoarder]

It's hard to have a battle of wits when everyone comes unarmed.

[tjmurphy]

And you have a great day Ma'am

[Bacon Lover]

Thanx, TJ Getting ready for a big 'ole storm up here.

[tjmurphy]

Be sure to keep your powder dry

[Bacon Lover]

no worries, my ammo is safe and the "other ammo", the girl kind, is always close to my breast

Liv

[TripleF]

Of the posts I read, yours was great Jerry!