The postman dropped a package at my door this morning. I was kind of surprized that he visited my house so early, must have been his very first stop. Then I saw it was from Glennbad and realized it was the POS package from New Hampshire, which explains why he wanted it off his truck quickly. As an aside, my wife was seasoning an iron skillet and seasoned it a bit much and that oder had made it's way up to my attic apartment, you all know that smell and the feeling of your eyes burning?
Well, burnt skillet smell no more, and I hadn't even opened the package yet
I sat down at my computer, pushed the keyboard aside and laid the package on the desk. Grasping my trusty Rough Rider whittler with tortoise shell handles (YEAH RIGHT!) I slowly cut the tape on one end of the package, I slowly and carefully turned the package 180' and cut the tape on the other end. Using the skill of a less than talented surgeon I made that long cut down the center of the package, the tape could hold the oder no longer
The POS (Pile 'o' Sheet) was emancipated. Free at last, free at last, great goodness gracious, free at last. With the smell of the burnt skillet already neutralized, the up-stairs took on the oder of what I can only explain as if you opened Tut's tomb about 4000 years too soon.
YA GET MY DRIFT HERE?!?! I lit a candle but it wouldn't stay lit
As I pull the box flaps open the first thing I see is a white box with black finger smudges all over it. From the white box I retreave a solid mahogany (YEAH, RIGHT AGAIN) display box. I lift the latch and open it up. Inside there is this beautiful(?) collectable folding hunter with scrimshaw (AGAIN, YEAH RIGHT) handles with a pretty picture of some kind of deer or antelope or one of those critters. Thinking this must be the "good" knife, I remove it from it's nest and open it fully to reveal "Fighter+ on one side of the tang and 440 S.Steel China on the other. I think out-loud to my self, "Is this a $20 knife"?
As I dig deeper in the package I find a tightly sealed plastic baggie plum full of knives of all sorts. When I open the baggie I realize that all of the Egyptians in Egypt must have farted in Tut's tomb before sealing it up!
(Remember the reference to Tut's tomb earlier?) As I remove each knife I open it up - NOPE, next knife - NOPE, next knife - NOPE, etc. It's become perfectly clear to me now that Glennbad will no longer participate in another POS RT......he has nothing left to send out!!
Then I see it, another tightly sealed baggie, is this the one
is this the $20 knife. I pull the seal apart and remove a small pocket knife. I open the knife and gaze at the tang stamp. It says "Western U.S.A. Could this be it? I love Western knives, though I only have one. This knife makes me happy
But in that same baggie is another knife, wrapped in swaddling tissue paper. I remove the wrapped up knife, carefully remove the tissue paper, and THERE IT IS!! I CAN'T BELIEVE MY OWN EYES. Before I ever open the main blade to see what it is, I ALREADY KNOW
THANK YOU GLENN
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU
THIS IS IT...THIS IS THE ONE...OH----MY----GOODNESS!!
A THING OF RARE BEAUTY, A SIGHT TO BEHOLD. I COULDN'T BE HAPPIER IF IT HAD BEEN A LEG LAMP!
Yer killin me here...........
